Chapter XX

Chapter XX

My Addiction

Step 6 Removed, not improvedBible Reading: Romans 6:5-11, 6:16-23, 7:15-25, 8:1-13

    Intimate: to communicate delicately and indirectly- belonging to or characterizing one’s deepest nature marked by very close association- suggesting informal warmth or privacy- of a very personal or private nature.

    I can think of no better way to wake up in the morning than to be thinking about the one you love. Thinking about the one who loves you unconditionally. To be able you show love because that love was first shown to us, I awake almost every morning with my first thoughts of just thanking God for loving me. I usually just begin my day by saying I love you Jesus. In this very intimate relationship I am beginning to understand and hear His voice (not audible) as he lays things on my heart to think about. As we are open to hear Him He will be able to minister to us by many different means. I awoke one morning this week with the thought that we have the mind of Christ. The mind of Christ in me is the new mind, (computer) that has deleted the old files and is daily reprogramming my mind with new programs through His word.

    I awake with the thought I have the mind of Christ and with the impression to read Romans Chapter 8. The verse, For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ. was not found in Romans but I Corinthians 2:16 KJV. What I did find was Step 6, which explained how by now having the mind of Christ has cured me and how the healing was brought about. When I was first found out I had already prayed for forgiveness and God did forgive me, but this time I wanted it to end with all that was within me. I had prayed a prayer to God to crush me, to make me into dust. That is when I wrote about the potter’s wheel and that is when I wrote the third verse to the song. It was only after I had prayed that prayer that I was able to break in tears for the sorrow I had caused others and the Lord.

    When reading Step 6 and the verses from Romans is when I realized how that is what God wanted for me to do. That prayer is what brought about the change in me.

    Step 6: Most of us have made all kind of attempts at self-improvement. I personally have listened to I know well over two or three thousand hours of motivational tapes and have a library of self-help books. I had some level of success at some of my attitudes but was never able to make changes in my struggle, which only led to more deep frustration. The books and tapes only helped cover my face more with a thicker false face to who I was inside.

    The problem, and the reason for the frustration was that character defects can only be removed they can not be improved. These defects must be put to death. Paul tells us that, Your old evil desires were nailed to the cross with [Jesus]; that part of you that loves to sin was CRUSHED and fatally wounded, so that your sin-loving body is no longer under sin’s control, no longer needs to be a slave to sin.   (Romans 6:6)

    The authorities and therapists are right. There is no cure. (There is no cure in band-aids, books, tapes, self-help seminars) but wait a minute, you said you were cured. I was cured but did not understand how until this lesson. The only cure is to die. You will have to die. I had to die. I died. I asked to be crushed to dust. God crushed me then he remade me into a new vessel. He crushed me into dust and made a new man out of me like he made Adam. He made me out of the dust that I had asked Him to make me into. The new man was made from the dust, with the mind of Christ. I know that this is true for there is no other way I could have left my self-gratifying habit behind if what I had in me were not dead. Romans 6:6-11, Your old evil desires were nailed to the cross with Him: that part of you that loves to sin was CRUSHED and fatally wounded, so that your sin-loving body is no longer under sin’s control, no longer needs to be a slave to sin: for when you are deadened to sin you are freed from all its allure and its power over you. And since your old sin-loving nature >died with Christ, we know that you will share his new life.

    When I was thirteen or fourteen years old I remember quite vividly reading in Romans 7:24 KJV, O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?   I have just gone and found again the Bible I had marked this verse in 1964. Romans 7:24 I had underlined. The verses proceeding Romans 7:24 I can remember not underlining just in case someone might pick up my Bible and read- Romans 7:19 KJV, For the good that I would I do not; but the evil which I would not, that I do.   Sam I found it! No the verse was not underlined but the word was circled ever so slightly. I have been found out, thirty-three years later. I had underlined, O wretched man that I am! , when I was living in a house full of, never before known, beautiful character, fun to be with, beautiful to me, girls. I moved out. I moved back with my father and grandparents. The problem was I had already learned it was far easier to please people that are hurting from broken homes and hurting relationships.

    When I moved back with my father and grandparents I was free from opportunity but still very much alive to what had been programmed into my life.

    If we can look at our mind like a computer we may be able to understand how our mind works. Let’s look at God as if He were mission control. Mission Control has given us a mission which we look at as Mission Impossible, Mission Control has blessed us in the past with many undercover missions but for some reason our undercover missions have been falling apart.

    One thing we must realize is that life can be an impossible mission. Then Mission Control calls us to what looks like an impossible mission for us to complete. There are no answers except if given by or through Him. There are no missions from Adam to Christ and including the agents that were disciples that were not completed. Anyone who Mission Control called completed their mission including Sampson, Jonah and King David. We must follow His instructing and read His manual on how our computer works and how to complete our mission. Listen not unto the voice of this world but listen unto Mission Control for the voice of this world is total foolishness to man. If we can listen unto Mission Control we will write down for our history mission complete.

    Mission Control will take us to a quiet place where we can rest and be revived. Mission Control will hide us in the cleft of a rock and cover us for our protection. (Exodus 33:22) As we continue to have trouble with our computer that has been programmed by others that have programmed viruses into our memory banks we will find that our computer will continue to bring up old files that need to be deleted. We as humans find that we kick our computers when they spit out old files through shorts. Then we find our fellow agents think they know how to get our computers working so they kick it also. As we call on Mission Control usually only in an emergency to forgive our own stupidity for trying to handle the shorts, He forgives us. It takes desperation before we totally give Mission Control what he has instructed us to do.

    If we read the instruction manual written by agent Paul in his document to the agents in Rome we will find that we have to smash, crush, kill and totally destroy our old computer. Mission Control will give us the protection we need to go into the heat of the battle to find our new computer. He gives us a new belt of truth, a bullet proof vest of approval, new running shoes for speed, a new shield for faith to stop the fiery arrows, a new helmet of salvation and a new weapon with all the power of the same mind as Mission Control. (Ephesians 6:13-17) Then Mission Control tells us we’re to go find our new computer. We will have to leave the cleft of the rock and go on our knees with sorrow and tears that fall like tear gas is making you cry. You will have to go to the place of the skull. (Mark 15:22) As you near you will find where the timber from two trees have been connected. This is where you will find your new computer. Cry out to Mission Control and tell Him that you agree with Him that you needed to totally destroy your old computer. Ask Him to have it destroyed on the two connecting trees that Mission Control’s son had been killed on. Then ask Him for the new one. The one that His son’s own thoughts will be in. Promise Mission Control to never allow anyone else to program your computer. Ask Him to give you new goals files. Tell Him that you will keep your new computer plugged into His mainframe with the new uplink He has provided. Take the new communications devices that he gives you so He can talk to you through His manual and His second in command. Mission Control will also give your computer a new protective covering that has been stained with the blood of His son. Stay plugged in, stay in daily communications with Mission Control. This would be a good time to ask Mission Control and your fellow agent for their forgiveness for not following the manual. When we do not follow the manual we can put our fellow agents and ourselves into very dangerous and life-threatening places. There have been some who have lost their lives and gone to prison. Ask Mission Control for a newer mission. Mission Control just may give you a new undercover mission with your fellow agent. May they be on the beaches of the world or wherever your mission may take you.

    God has a mission for you to complete. Don’t take second best. You cannot go wrong when doing God’s will completely according to His word. If you are washing your hands because your mate has rejected God’s will or you are taking back you mate because they have proved they are accepting God’s will, if you will pray and follow His leading you can not go wrong. What God has in store for your future will be awesome. Listen to His voice and trust His heart and then pray and trust your own heart.

    Now let’s go back to Romans and see what it takes to get a new mind, (heart) the mind of Christ. Instruction Manual: The Bible: Section- Blessings of being crushed.   I don’t understand myself at all, for I really want to do what is right, but I can’t. I do what I don’t want to- what I hate. I know perfectly well that what I am doing is wrong, and my bad conscience proves that I agree with these laws I am breaking. But I can’t help myself because I’m no longer doing it. It is sin inside me that is stronger than I am that makes me do these evil things.

    I know I am rotten through and through so far as my old sinful nature is concerned. No matter which way I turn I can’t make myself do right. I want to but I can’t. When I want to do good, I don’t; and when I try not to do wrong, I do it anyway. Now if I am doing what I don’t want to, it is plain where the trouble is: sin still has me in its evil grasp.

    It seems to be a fact of life that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love to do God’s will so far as my new nature is concerned; but there is something else deep within me, in my lower nature, that is at war with my mind and wins the fight and makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. In my mind I want to be God’s willing servant, but instead I find myself still enslaved to sin.